You Don't Wanna Get Cold

There are two thermostats in the office- the old one that doesn't work and the newer one that does. When it gets cold, Jack walks over to the thermostats and proceeds to fiddle with the old, broken thermostat. When someone tells him that he's using the wrong thermostat, he shoots them a nasty look and immediately proclaims, "I think the heat just kicked on." Nothing kicked on, Jack. Except maybe your senility.